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Azrael:
Yeah, cause Chernobog totally stroked my crotch last night.
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Leviathan:
That's why I did not want to sit next to him.
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*Azrael pantomimes Chernobog stroking his crotch*
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Azrael:
*exasperated* Thank you??
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Leviathan:
Now...tell me the truth...It aroused you a little, huh?
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*Azrael shakes head and makes disgusted face*
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Azrael:
NO...he's black!
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Chernobog:
She's on your team.
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Leviathan:
Naked. Glistening.
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Azrael:
Ugh.
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Chernobog:
You must sex her until her hair is straight.
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Arzael:
*gags*
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Chernobog:
Wait.
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Chernobog:
Down there.
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Azrael:
*dry heaves* *leaves room*
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Azrael:
*Returns with a large kitchen knife* We have ways for dealing with this.
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*Discussing an attractive female Jewish professor known by Chernobog and Azrael*
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Azrael:
She said she left it at her house! Bah!
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Chernobog:
You should go to her house and yell "Hey!"
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Azrael:
*seductively* Hey.
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Chernobog:
*Just* like that.
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Azrael:
You're a tree and I'll climb your branches to the fruit. That's straight out of the song of Solomon, baby.
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Chernobog:
If you're going to climb me you'll need to at least wash my feet first.
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Azrael:
Now tell me the truth, there's a secret Jew position isn't there?
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Chernobog:
Now how do we position ourselves to make the Star?
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Azrael:
I forget, is it called the "David" or the "Goldstein"?
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*Leviathan reading previous post out loud*
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Leviathan:
What the fuck? Really?
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Chernobog:
I heard about that one. I laughed then, too.
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Azrael:
I'm a good person. Happy...Jew-Christmas.
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*Looking at the couch storage compartment*
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Chernobog:
Wow, you could totally hide a body in there.
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Azrael:
You think we haven't thought of that?
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Baal:
Yeah, there are actually 7 different places to hide bodies in the house. Of course, I'll only tell you about 6 of them, because the last is where we're putting your body.
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Chernobog:
Oh, okay. How would you dispose of me?
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Azrael:
Lime
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Baal:
Various Chemicals. Speaking of which, have you broken any bones?
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Leviathan:
Or tattoos?
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Chernobog:
Yeah...here and here.
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Baal:
Yeah...we'll have to remove those. And you see a dentist regularly, right? Yeah, the head has to come off too.
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Chernobog:
If you're going to cut me up, at least eat my brain and heart to gain their power!
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Azrael:
I was going to eat something else to gain its power.
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Baal:
You can't. You think you'd be the first person to try that? Science has shown that it too tough and stringing to eat.
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Azrael:
Really now?
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Baal:
[Azrael] you cannot eat his penis, it is not like a sausage!